Random Thursday Thoughts...

• My house literally looks like it was hit by a tornado. I can't remember the last time it was this messy. I swear if the president showed up at my door I wouldn't let him in right now.

• I've been a total slack-a** on my situps this week. So now I'm a week behind in my 200 Sit-up Challenge...super.

• I start training for my sprint triathlon soon. It's in July, so I NEED to get going on this, especially the swimming. But I'm not quite sure how to start.

• I totally had to look up how to spell triathlon for that previous bullet.

• If I could have only one food for the rest of my life, it would be pizza.

• All of a sudden my son is over The Wiggles... and I've got to admit, I miss them a bit.

• Sometimes when the cat pukes in the basement, I'll "pretend" I didn't see it and wait until my husband goes down there and cleans it up.

• Ok, sometimes it's not just the basement when I "pretend" to not see it (it's gross, I know).

• I stole this 'Random Thoughts' blog idea from http://one-twenty-five.tumblr.com/ 

• I can't stand New Years Eve. There is SUCH pressure to go out and have fun, and I feel like it never lives up to the hype. I'm almost glad I can't go out anymore, now that I have little kids.

• At the massage party I went to the other day, I was shocked at how much weight the hostess had gained since I had seen her last. I have to admit... it made me feel better about myself (as horrible as that sounds).

• All I want is to eat McDonald's for lunch today.

• Sometimes I spend hours at work watching my kids on the webcam at daycare. I'm surprised I haven't gotten into trouble yet with my IT Dept.

• When I started my book on tape last week, I didn't realize it was a teen novel. But I'm still listening to it anyway and I looooooooooooooooooooooooooooove it.

-V

"If Not Now, When?"

Last week, A sent me the link to this blog. It was about this woman, who was a life-long over eater. She always dieted, lost the weight, gained it back, the same vicious cycle that we can all relate to. Anyway one day she said she went to an Overeaters Anonymous meeting and there was a woman speaking and she said to the group that every time she felt the need to binge she'd try to stop herself by thinking, "if not now, when?"  When was she going to stop this, when was she going to get healthy? So last week I printed that quote out and I have it taped up in my cube at work and I'm going to make one for me at home to put on my fridge. Because if I don't do this weight loss thing now, at 37 years old, when the hell am I ever going to do this? I've spent soooooooooooo many years NOT doing it. So it's now or never.

Anyway, great quote, I love it and I've already found myself using it when I want to eat bad. So this will be my motto for the New Year. "If Not Now, When?" So thanks for passing that on, A.

Wow... that was awful deep for the first blog of the week, wasn't it? 

We had a wonderful Christmas! The kids were in Heaven, which is all that matters. They just love being surrounded by family. They love to go to Grandma's house, it was just so great watching them bask in all of that. The driving was a bit much for a 2.5 day span, but oh well.

My husband loved his recordable alarm clock. It took J and I several tries to get him to say "wake up daddy" on que. But we finally got it.

Yesterday I had that massage party, which was also great. It was fun to see friends I hadn't seen in years. The kids were surprisingly good. Especially since it took us over 2 hours to get there with all the snow that was falling yesterday. Ugh, I'm already over winter! The way home, not so good. S screamed for about an hour and I almost lost my mind. Literally... LOST... MY... MIND. Little did I know, that she had pooed (sorry if that was TMI) and that's why she was screaming. Good times....

I did get the best massage I ever had though. This lady was wonderful. I don't like a super hard massages and most masseuse's even when I tell them this, still do it too hard. But this lady rocked and it was perfect.

I'm ready to get back on track this week with food and exercise. My husband is in New Mexico until Friday night, so the workouts aren't going to be there much this week. Just whatever I can slip in between working and taking care of the kids. I am going to try to run this weekend if possible. I am really loving running outside this winter. I've never done that before. I've always just stopped running outside once it got cold. But with the right running gear, its really not bad. I mean I ran 4 miles on Friday! How awesome was that? So I think I'm going to keep it up, as long as we don't get a mountain of snow.

Ok, I NEED to get some work done here...

-V

Not Even Waiting.

NOT even waiting for NYE to say it starts today, holy-holiday-heavy.  The beauty is that its not just me, its my normally ultra skinny hubby too.  He got on the scale and was about 10lbs up as well, if you knew him you would understand.  He looks at french fries and loses 3lbs.  Today we started, we have eaten healthy all day (for those of you holiday carbing you understand this is a feat to be proud of) and we have planned meals for all week.  We each even took turns and ran today, each effort starts somewhere - mine is here.
Hope all of you have a wonderful, healthy (or fattening) holiday and are ready to kick things off right.  Strength in numbers!!
A

Just Sayin'

I ran 4 miles before we left for up north today.... holla!

-V

Merry Christmas!

Ok peeps, we are leaving for northern Michigan tomorrow so you won't hear from me until Wednesday. Have a great Christmas! Here's to getting back on track once all this crazy Christmas stuff is over...

One side note: since we are leaving tomorrow, Santa comes to our house tonight. My 3-year-old keeps trying to convince me to just have "one bite" of Santa's cookies. "He won't mind mommy!"  Suuuuuure he won't....but then mommy would have nothing to eat once you go to bed. (did I just say that out loud?)  =)


-V

The Good's and Bad's of Yesterday

Good = Got up at 6am and worked out before work.

Bad = Entire department went and had Chinese Food buffet for lunch.... ate enough food to feed small village.

Good = Sister-in-law invited me to my first Zumba class last night and I went even though I had already worked-out that day and was very tired.

Bad =  Felt guilty for being away from my kids all day and then only being home and hour and leaving again for Zumba.

Good = Zumba was an AWESOME workout. Sweated my butt off!

Bad = After doing Zumba, realized I might be worst dancer and most uncoordinated person on planet.

Good = My husband, knowing I felt guilty for leaving the kids, kept them awake until after I came home from Zumba so I could see them.

Bad = Had a bagel after kids went to bed because I was so hungry from 2 workouts that day.

Bad = 3am, heard a crashing noise only to find J's basketball hoop had fallen off the wall and smashed into a million pieces on the ground.

-V

Cramping + Fat = Can't Run Excuses

A here.
Well, I am both proud of myself and angry at myself. 
Proud: I ran 2x this week already + did my sit ups.  And I do mean ran, not like fast walked but ran - however about 10 minutes in I started cramping each time and then I had to walk and then I ran and then I cramped (you see the succession here). 
That then leads to, well I can't run - I just need to walk - I just don't have the time....again...you see how this works.
Oh, and I ate an extra dessert last night after dinner - WTF.  COME ON HOLIDAYS, RUDE.
a

Spinning

Back in the day, before I had kids, I used to love to go to Spinning class at the gym. I loved that they turned the lights off and you closed your eyes and you just listened to the instructor and the music and just peddled the sh*t out of your bike (sorry, I have a truck driver mouth and I never get to swear at home anymore, so I've got to get it out of me somehow). I loved how just the beat of a song can make you believe that you were actually biking up a mountain, or going crazy fast down one. I think the best shape I've ever been in, was when I was regularly going to Spinning class.

About 6 months before I had my first child, my husband and I invested in a Spinning bike for our home. And my entire first pregnancy I would get up before work and workout on that thing. Me! I know, hard to believe, right? But then my son was born, and time was tight and I didn't get down there as much. Then my daughter was born, time was even tighter, etc. etc. etc.  Anyway, I've been getting back down there on that bike again lately. I had forgotten how much I loved it. Even though I'm not in a class per say, I still can turn out the lights, blare my iPod and close my eyes and imagine myself on a mountain somewhere. Even at 6am in the morning... which is what I did this morning.

I love love love getting my workouts done in the morning. Not only do I feel good all day about myself, but it's nice to get it out of the way and not have it hanging over my head all day. And inevitably something always seems to come up if I wait until the end of the day after the kids go to bed. So I think getting up before work and doing this is really going to work for me. I just wish I could do it more, but I can only do it on the days my husband is home. There's no way to get a workout done before work when I'm by myself, because I've got to get me and 2 kids up, fed and dressed and out the door by 7:20am. But hey, I'll take what I can get.

I did those darned sit-ups this morning again. 180!  I know I say this every time I write about it, but they are getting HARD. The last set was a set of 48 and I had to take a 10 second break about halfway through. But I'm doing them.

Anyway, my eating hasn't been perfect, but I'm not on a full out V binge. Which is what normally happens over the holidays. And I'm getting my workouts in, so hopefully I'll break even this holiday season. I'm looking forward to Christmas this weekend, but I'm also looking forward to the holidays being over and me getting back on track with my eating. It's crunch time in January, with less than 2 months left for me to lose the 19lbs by Feb 20th. I know I'm down, but not sure how much yet. I'll probably use one of my weigh-ins (I only get 3 in this contest) the first week in January, just to know where I'm at.

-V

Waiting For My 'Click'

I've been reading so many blogs about how people think having a food addiction is so hard because unlike smoking or drinking or whatever, you STILL have to eat. And I couldn't agree with that more. I'm not making light of smoking or drinking problems, I'm sure that are super hard to conquer. But I'm such an "on or off" type of person. When I quit smoking back in my 20's, while it was hard, I did it with really no problems. Because in my warped brain it was simple, I just didn't do it anymore. Same when I was pregnant, I just didn't drink. You either do or you don't. But with eating, it's like you have to deal with that addiction, not just every day, but MULTIPLE times a day. Every single time I put food into my mouth, it's a struggle for me to eat healthy. There is always that devil on my shoulder that wants me to put down the apple and eat a piece of pizza instead. It's really hard for me and I'm so sick of the constant struggle.

What makes it even more frustrating is that my sister and brother don't have these issues. Why am I the one who has to have it? My sister is soooooooooooo skinny. Granted she eats healthy 99.9% of the time. But why is it so easy for her to choose healthy? Even my husband is like that. He can have a pizza and a grilled chicken breast in front of him. And he'll choose the chicken breast because he knows it's better for him. Why don't I have this in me?

Let's even take A, for instance. The entire time we've been friends, we were always food buddies. And by that I mean we always either dieted together or were bad together. We always struggled with weight. But after she had her son, something clicked in her head and she just didn't do the yo yo dieting anymore. She just made healthy choices. Where's the 'click' in my head? Am I ever going to have the 'click?' I'm 37 years old, is it ever going to happen?

On a positive note, I worked out after my kids went to bed last night. That's pretty good for me, because I'm just not a night worker outer. I have 10 times more energy in the mornings, so that's why I enjoy doing it before work when I can. But I sucked it up and went down in our basement/gym last night with my husband and did the Total Gym. I'm going to be sooooooooore today, let me tell you. I also did my sit-ups. 180! There is only 2 weeks left of my 200-Sit-Up Challenge. Hard to believe. These next 2 weeks are going to be killer though.

-V

Hey Holidays, Thanks.

A here. Wait, let me revise - FAT A here.
I am up, up, up on the scale and its just making me sad.  I ran on Saturday and that made me feel a little better but then I ate like crap on Saturday night and ate 3 cookies Sunday night before bed...and when I say "ate" let me say "CRAMMED" them into my mouth.  I don't even like cookies that much yet I kept eating them, growl.
I am going to try and be really good this week to combat the craziness from last week.  I have a bunch of things to do and only a few holiday dinners to partake in.  I am going to try and run every day this week even if for just 20 minutes.  I've not tracked one calorie and have said no to NOTHING.
Am I just setting myself up for failure at this time of year?!
GRRRRRRRRRRRR
a

Perfect Holiday Gift

I listen to books on tape on my commute to work. I'm currently listening to 'I Don't Know How She Does It' (they just made it into a movie with Sarah Jessica Parker) by Allison Pearson. Anyway, as I was listening this morning the main character was talking about how her daughter got her this travel alarm clock that recorded her daughter's voice telling her it was time to get up. How perfect for my traveling husband, right? Who doesn't want to wake up to their 3-year-old son's voice screaming "DADDY IT'S TIME TO GET UP!" when they are staying in a nice, quiet, kid-free hotel? So I have been scouring the internet this morning trying to find one that would get here in time for Christmas, without me having to pay a billion dollars in shipping fees. I think I found one, and I guess only time will tell if it gets here in time. Let's hope! It was only $14.95 too! I can't wait! Here's the link: http://www.futurememories.com/fm-kit-ut87.html

So yeah... that's pretty much how I've spent my morning here at work, searching the internet for that clock. I bet my company is suuuuuuure glad they hired me.

Other than that, nothing much to report. This weekend was fun. I did ok on the eating at my husband's extended family Christmas on Saturday. Yesterday I did really good, just because we were so busy. I took the kids (along with a friend of mine and her kids) on the Santa Train. It's a train (obviously) that you ride and Santa comes on board and gives the kids presents, etc. The website said it was an hour ride, which I thought would be pushing it with my 1-year-old. She really doesn't like to sit still all that much, but I thought she'd be ok. Well, the darn train was an hour EACH way... sure doesn't say that on the website. So I spent the entire hour ride home, walking S up and down the isle about a zillion times. I was exhausted by the time we got off that damned train. But my 3-year-old, J had fun, which is all that matters.

I work 4 days again this week (Mon-Thurs) and then Friday we are off to my husband's parents house until Christmas morning. Then we'll swing over to Detroit to see my parents and then back home Christmas night. So basically we will be driving all over the state of Michigan in 2 days... good times.

I'm going to try and get 2-3 workouts in this week, to combat any holiday eating I am going to do this weekend. I've got those God forsaken sit-ups too, that I have to do. I swear, I'm starting to hate sit-ups with a passion...

-V

Working Friday

I normally don't work Friday's, but work asked if I could do an extra day this week, so here I am. And here is a post from me on a Friday, which also doesn't normally happen.

I got up at 6am and worked out this morning. It wasn't as bad as I thought it was going to be. I'm always up anyway, so 6am is nothing. I got on my spin bike for 30 minutes and then did my sit-ups. 152 of them! They are getting HARD. The final set they usually have you do a ton and sometimes I need to take a break, mid-set. I'm not sure if that's allowed or not, but I can't help it. It's really really tough. A few of the girls that I've been doing this with, have dropped out (as I'm suspecting A has too, since I haven't heard her talk about it in a while, but I'm not for sure) but I'm sticking with it. It seems so often when I do these type of things with my friends, that they usually drop out after a week or two. Why is that? I'm not saying I'm so cool or great, but I would never get into a contest or competition with someone and then just drop out. I guess it's the competitiveness in me. I know my sister will stick to it through the end though, so at least I won't be alone. We have the same competitive genes I guess. But I have to say I'm disappointed that only 3 weeks in there are only 2 or 3 of us left. I promise, I will not quit though.

So the Tuesday after Christmas I was invited to a super fun party. My friend T is having all the girls over, along with all our kids. She's having a babysitter watch the kids while we all get massages in the other room. How fun is that? Of course there will be yummy food and drinks there all day, which I will have to be careful around. But I'm excited, and it's something different. There are going to be a lot of girls there I haven't seen in years. These are my Detroit girls, who I was friends with for years and years. Since I live 2 hours away now, I don't see a lot them too often anymore, so it should be a great time.

Well have a great weekend!

-V

Darn You Holiday Season!

Man it has been rough this past week. There is tempting food EVERYWHERE! Honestly, I don't think I've ever tried to curb my eating during the holidays before. And now I can see why... its hard! Every time I turn around someone is giving us food. Cookies, candies, cakes... shoot me. If I can just break even for the holidays I'll be happy. Then I can shift into Biggest Loser mode for Jan and Feb to get to my 19lbs weight loss goal by Feb 20th.

Yesterday, it was like the Gods were laughing at me. So I take my kids to the mall to see Santa and get some remaining presents. We go to the food court at lunch and I order my kids some food (I had brought a banana for myself). I ordered the children's meals; grilled cheeses, one french fry for them to split and drinks. So the wait for the food is forever, and as I'm finally picking up my tray, the guy gives me THREE orders of fries instead of just the one I had ordered. He was just being nice because I had waited so long, but really? And of course I ate some of them, because I have the willpower of a 2-year-old.... **sigh**

Then this Saturday is my husband's extended family Christmas. I can only imagine the food that will be there. Hopefully I can stay away from it.

At least I got some time to hop on my spinning bike yesterday when the kids were napping. And I did my sit-ups too. Hopefully I can get a run in tonight after work, since its so unseasonably warm here today. For sure I am getting up before work tomorrow morning and hopping back on my spinning bike. I figure if I workout as much as I can, maybe I'll break even on the weight this week.

Wish me luck!
-V

So... Um... Yeah...

... I sorta ate like sh*t this past weekend. I know, I know, stop rolling your eyes at me. Yes, I know I was doing sooooooo well. And then I just screwed up. BUT, but, but, I am back on track today. The old V would have just said F-it and gone down into spiral of bad eating. (btw I have a total truck driver mouth, but I try to be good on this blog).  But I am not going to. I am back on track today.

I did end up running 3 miles yesterday, to try and combat a bit of the eating. I will workout today again. I figure it's the only thing I can do at this point to try and not gain all the weight back.

I swear I'm like an addict sometimes, it's the only way I can explain it. It's like I get a taste of the "good/bad food" and I just can't stop. I just keep going and going... man I have issues.

Other than the whole food snafu, I had a great weekend. We had a good time in Detroit for my niece's birthday party. I ended up only taking my 3-year-old with me because my daughter got a stomach bug on Thursday night and I didn't want to infect the entire house. So only having one kid was like the easiest thing in the world. I can't believe I ever used to complain when I only had one.

My kids went up north with my husband yesterday, so I had an actual day to myself. It was awesome, I got so much stuff done. Mainly wrapping Christmas gifts and just getting caught up on life. Though I have to admit by the end of the day, when I had all my stuff done, I was almost bored. I'm not quite sure how to relax anymore, I'm so used to being busy 100% of the time. I get one more night tonight to myself before they come back tomorrow morning.

I ended up doing 321 Sit-ups last week. They are getting HARD. I can only imagine what this week will be like. So here's to getting back on track this week...

-V

Yay Me!

Ok, I am super proud of myself for yesterday. It was my niece's 13th birthday and I  went over her house with the kids to wish her a happy birthday. Well my sister-in-law had gotten a few pizza's for dinner and everyone was chowing down. AND, I did not have one single bite of it. I mean, if I could have only one food for the rest of my life, it would be pizza. So this was hard for me. Very hard. I even had to cut one of the pieces up into little bites for my 1-year-old and sit her on my lap and feed it to her, piece by piece. Talk about torture. But I did it. Go V!

I'm traveling back to Detroit tomorrow to my parents for the night. I feel like all I ever do is drive to Detroit. It's my niece's 2nd birthday party. So that's why we are headed out. And of course there will be pizza and cake, so yet again it will be a struggle. I am allowing myself one cheat meal a week, so technically I could eat it. But I'm going to try not to.

Sunday morning my husband is going to take the kids up north with him and bring them to his mom's so he can hunt, Sunday/Monday/Tues. So I get the house to myself for 2 days. Whoot whoot! I'm excited that I can get some of this Christmas shopping done and presents wrapped while they are gone. I have to work Monday/Tuesday, but it still gives me the nights free to do this. This will be my last time home alone without the kids break, until next Fall when hunting season starts up again, so I'm going to enjoy it. My mother-in-law lives in Florida in the winter, so they are not around to help out.

I will also make sure I workout every day they are gone. I'm up to 106 sit-ups now for my 200 Sit-Up Challenge. Halfway there. It was hard yesterday, that last set killed me. Its been fun though because my 3-year-old loooooooves when I do them. He tries to do them with me and counts for me. And when I'm struggling, he yells "keep going Mommy!" Its so cute. All day yesterday, he was like "is it time for sit-ups yet?"

-V

Huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuungry

Man I am just HUNGRY today. It took everything I had in me to not jump in my car on my lunch hour and go get some bad food. I had a Weight Watchers meal for lunch along with a cheese stick and I'm still starving.

Today is going to be difficult.... grrr.

Well, Good Morning To Me...

So yesterday I got up at 5:30am and went Christmas shopping. Crazy? Yes. But there was a reason. A store close to my house had 20% off all general merchandise that day. My husband was leaving for a trip later in the morning, so I couldn't go at night after work because I had to go pick up the kids from daycare. And I wasn't dragging them there... I'm not that crazy. Anyway, I went before work and got a lot of shopping done.

Well this morning, because I was up at 5:30am yesterday morning, I was wide frickin' awake. GOD, I seriously cannot sleep anymore. It's so annoying. I mean if I slept til 7am it would be a fabulous thing. 7am...that's it. If 'Single V' could see me now, she'd run away screaming in the other direction.

-V

Vegas. UGH

A here and I am off to Vegas for the week. 
I am still happy to report that I am doing pretty well with the eating and working out.  My sit-up challenge proved to be great last week and I did a total of 94!  For me, thats awesome and I also did the treadmill 4x during the week and Sunday night.  Ask V, thats GOOD for me!
I am a little down because my weight keeps ranging from 129.5-131.5. I just want it off and gone but then I do things like drink a ton of wine on a Thursday and Friday and wonder why I am keeping it on.  I keep trying to stay on track but then in the back of my mind know that I'm working out so I think I have a little wiggle room - but I dont.  I have to get this weight off and I need to stay focused and positive, that will be hard in Vegas as I am surrounding by eating out EVERY MEAL and drinking day and night.  Ugh.  I am going into it at 129.5 and we will see how I come out of it on Friday.  I did bring my workout clothes though - that is a plus!
Have a great week - a

Guess Not

So, I researched any upcoming races in Michigan and there are literally none until the Spring. Well that's a lie, there is a Jingle Balls one next week, but I can't see me training for a 5k in 1 week. After that, there's nothing until Spring. Guess that's living in Michigan for you. Soooooooo,  on to Plan B. My sister-in-law was just telling me about this personal trainer that she has been using that will come to your house. And she's only $20 a session. How awesome right? So I put that on my Christmas list to my family and I know for sure that both my mom and sister-in-law have gotten me some sessions. So I'm super pumped about that. Plus I am going to ask her to make up a program for me to follow, workout wise. See, if I know this lady is coming on a certain day and she told me to get 2 workouts in, before she see's me, I will totally do it, because how embarrassing to say I didn't? (I know that was a total run-on sentence, but that's how I talk... I just ramble, so get used to it.) So that should be a nice boost to the workout plan. I'm still doing my 200-Sit-Up-Challenge. I'm onto week 2. I did a total of 235 sit-ups last week. WHEW! I can't imagine doing that in one day, but that's the goal.

Eating-wise I'm doing well. Not too many slip-ups. AND, I needed to tighten my belt, one more loop hole this past weekend. Yay! I sure wish I could weigh myself, but as the contest rules state, I can only weigh myself 3 times between now and Feb 20th. And I need to wait more towards the end so I know I am within my goal weight. But I was very happy to not only notice results on my body, but also see that I needed that belt tightened.

Today starts 7 days alone without my husband. He is traveling all week and then off hunting this weekend. I want to be annoyed that he's leaving all weekend, but this is the last time he'll hunt for the remainder of the year. So I guess I'll suck it up... sigh.

Happy Monday!
-V

5K Race

I think I need to sign up for a race of some sorts. I keep reading these awesome blogs like http://girlwalker.blogspot.com/ and http://one-twenty-five.tumblr.com/ and all these people really jump-started their weight loss by doing this.

It's hard for me because I don't have a regular workout schedule, due to my husband's pilot schedule. That and the fact that is winter here in Michigan, so running outside can be difficult. But there is no better motivation to get into shape, than to be signed up for a race. I've done many 5K's and one 10K. So I'm no stranger to this. I just wish I had a friend who would do it with me. Since A lives in Atlanta, that's out. And most of my other local friends are just not very interested in this sort of thing.

Anyway, I think I am going to do some research and see what races are coming up within the next month or two. Any tips for running outside in the winter?

V