Hereeee Kidney, Kidney, Kidney

I had my sonogram today and it turns out that I have only my right kidney - yes, you read correctly I have only one kidney - my left.  This has to be one of the most surreal situations ever, I feel like I should at least weigh less...but I don't.
I was able to scoot in at 10:45 today and BEGGED the tech to tell me one way or the other as I've been going MAD not knowing.  Loads of research later and it could be genetic and I will be getting B scanned hopefully next week to ensure he is rockin 2 of those bad boys and not just one. 
Next obvious question - what does this mean.  Well, I'm not exactly sure.  I have to go and see a nephrologist and I now have to watch all medicines I take going forward.  Apparently my Left kidney is larger to compensate but overall looks normal.  Does this mean I have to cut back the wine?
I've booked a trip home to see my mom with B for a long weekend which means I get a stop over with V!  Much needed family time and I need my BF for sure.  Somehow that helps me to feel better knowing I get good BF and family time in just a short while.
Any advise of knowledge of this is appreciated! 
thanks, a

April 29th

That is the day husband leaves for flight school. We found out yesterday. He comes back on May 23rd. So, 3 1/2 weeks alone... with 2 kids... and 2 cats. **sigh**  I knew this was coming, but actually hearing the dates makes me feel a bit overwhelmed. It's not even so much my sanity that I'm worried about (total lie), its more how I'm afraid my diet and exercise are going to suffer. I'm not sure how I can get a great workout in during this time. I do short Jillian workouts on the days that my husband works, but that is always followed by 3-4 days of long workouts when he's home. I just don't want to go backwards in this process that I'm in. This is definitely going to be one of the biggest struggles I've had so far.

Since husband will be gone the majority of May, I now have to cancel/postpone 2 of my races. The first is my 10K. There is just no way I can train for this race with him being gone. I can't run further than up and down my street when husband is gone (so I can hear my monitors). And even if I was able to train, I don't have anyone to watch my kids during the actual  race... sooooooo not gonna happen. But this might be a blessing in disguise with that crazy pain in my butt anyway. I think I need to let this thing heal for a bit. But I've already found a new 10k race to run in June. The Heart of Detroit 10K is on June 30th. My sister and I are going to do it together. So I'm still going to do this, just a bit later than I had anticipated.

My bike race will also be missed. It's the weekend of May 20th. It's a 2-day thing, so obviously there is no way I can do this. But, this race is also repeated in September, which husband and I decided we would do then. So, again, not canceled, just postponed. This one I'm more bummed about. Not only does this bike race really force us to get in shape, but it's nice having a weekend spent with just husband and I and no kids.

Ok, pity party is over for the day.

I did get some new running shoes yesterday. I went and spent A LOT of money on a really good pair. I'm hoping I will sustain less injuries this way. I can't wait to try them out. Hopefully tomorrow afternoon, once husband gets home from work I can break them in.

Oh nooooooooooooo! I forgot to put my phone on vibrate and just now my phone starting BLARING the Yo Gabba Gabba theme song for all to hear. So embarrassing....

-V

Things I'm Annoyed with Today

• My husband snoring ALL NIGHT LONG... really?

• J pushing S down 7,000 times already today. Doesn't it ever get old?

• The cat consistently puking every morning. SLOW DOWN while you are eating! Maybe I should take my own advice.

• The creaking in my ankles as I tried to sneak out of bed this morning without waking husband. Man I'm getting old.

• How I wanted to make it to playgroup so bad this morning, since we haven't gone in 2 weeks. But I just could not get my sh*t together to make it there on time.

• S shouting 'no' a zillion times today... sweet. Can we at least go back to saying 'Elmo' all the time?

• The fact that on the days I don't work, my kids always seem to wake up early. But on a work/school day? They will sleep in til 8.


Things That Rock About Today:

• All the hugs and kisses I've gotten from S so far today. (even though when she kisses me she gets her snot all over my face.... ahhhhh, the joys of motherhood)

• Got a great bike ride in. Need to really get my pinched nerved butt in gear for this bike race I have coming up.

• How great that on a random Wednesday, husband, the kids and I get to hang out all day. Being a pilot's wife is hard sometimes, but on days like these, it's really cool.

• How excited my kids were when I showed them the new Yo Gabba Gabba bath toys I got them. J yelled "Oh my God, these are AMAZING!" when he saw them. (when did J start saying "oh my God?")

• The fact that it's March in Michigan and it's 60 degrees.

• Found out J got into the Preschool class I wanted. We got the days/time AND teacher I wanted. Makes all the stress I had about getting signed up worth it.

-V

Today is New Day

What a crazy week it feels like!  I am off and running, now mid-week and am getting ready for a month of travel - no fun.  This means that I'll be eating on the road and need to get my head wrapped around that thought too.  UGH, you know I've not been great and though I have the pass to go back to Zumba do you think I've been?  Annnnnddd that would be no.  Need to pull it together, I will start by taking Crozzie for a walk this afternoon, that will force me out of the house and force me into some sort of physical activity.
On a super fun note, E and I went shopping for mattresses last night and ended up ordering one of those Tempur-Pedic™ beds, I've never laid on anything so comfortable in my life! I cannot wait for it to get here, I pulled the - I have a super bad back and only one kidney card and I "think" that pushed E over the edge for it.  Of course we had a nice scrap about it but oh well, happy comfy bed is on its way!
Hope all is well in your worlds, help me get skinny web friend - I need IT!
a

The Power of Elmo

So I went for a run last night. And that ##*!*@! pinched nerve/pulled muscle/whatever this is in my butt, was killing me. Every step hurt. This sucks for multiple reasons, but the worst being that it used to only bug me when I did intervals, but now it's moved to running in general. To be honest I just don't know what to do at this point. I guess I have no choice but to take a week or 2 off of running and give it a chance to heal. This going to make my 5K I have in April and my 10K I have in May a bit tough. But I guess in the long run, I'm doing all these races to prepare for the sprint triathlon in July, so I need to be fully healed by then. Man this is frustrating!

I did 3 miles, ran about 2.5 of that. Had it not been for the pain in my rear, I could have easily gone further than that. But I didn't want to injure myself further. So I guess for now I will concentrate on biking. Especially since the Zoo-de-Mac (54 mile bike trek) is only about a month and a half away. And for now, biking doesn't seem to be hurting me there.

On another sour note, I found out last night that one of my oldest friends, her mother will probably die this week. She's got cancer and has taken a turn for the worst. So sad. This is really one of the first friend's I've had who's mother has passed. So let's pray I don't need to go back to Detroit this weekend for a funeral.

Ok, something positive. Even with a few eating snafu's last week, I'm still losing weight. I haven't hopped on a scale, but my clothes are all huge on me. It's a great feeling. I'm not a huge believer in the scale. I don't think it always reflects what is happening with your weight and body (unless you are steadily gaining... then it always reflects the truth). And I don't like how seeing a number stay the same can set me off into a spiral of depression and anger. So, per my husband, I usually only weigh myself once a month and I make sure my clothes are continuing to get bigger. Which is what is happening, so yay. Though I do think I will weigh myself after this week, just to see where I'm at.

So S is 16 months old now and is really starting to talk. Though she will NOT say momma. She says Dada, Zeus (our cat), bye bye, and of course the lovely 'no'. And she says Elmo. ALL THE TIME. Everything is Elmo. But momma? Nothin... hmpf. Do you think throwing back in her face the fact that I nursed her for 10.5 months would help?

-V

The Good's and Bad's of My Weekend

Good: Had such a wonderful time babysitting my niece and nephew Saturday night. I don't get to spend a lot of one-on-one time with them, so this was nice.

Bad: That whole having to feed a baby every 3-4 hours, all night long. I forgot what that type of sleep deprivation felt like.

Good: Had a GREAT workout with my trainer before I left for Detroit on Saturday. We did intervals on the treadmill and my glute area didn't hurt that bad.

Bad: My trainer thinks I actually have a pinched nerve in there and told me that I need stop doing intervals until it heals. Though she said I could still jog, since it doesn't seem to be hurting me. It's the constant starting and stopping of the intervals that is irritating it.

Good: Found my old high school yearbook at my sister's house (not sure why she had it). It was hilarious to go through it. Man the hair and the bangs from the 90's... NOT a good look.

(this is not me, but she could be my hair twin from high school)

Bad: Stayed up waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too late looking at the yearbook, so when at 2am the baby woke up to eat, I wanted to DIE!

Good: The kids having some good quality 'Daddy Time' while I was gone.

Bad: It's been a while since I've been gone from my kids over night and I really, really missed them.

Good: Instead of lazing around during the kids nap times yesterday, like I sooooo wanted to do, I made my healthy lunches for the week (with veggies!) and made an awesome dinner. Turkey meatballs in a spinach vodka marinara sauce with whole wheat spaghetti... mmmmmmm.

Bad: I got so caught up in making dinner, I completely forgot to make my protein shake for this morning... boo!


Good: Met a friend and her kids at this new park yesterday afternoon. It was soooooo nice out and this park was so huge and awesome. My kids loved it!


Bad: Forgot to put sunblock on and my face got a little fried.

Good (always have to end with a 'good'): Getting back on track with my eating this week. Having been in my car a lot of this weekend, my eating was a bit "off." So I'm happy to get back to it.

Happy Monday all!

-V

Apologies to the Parents I Judged Four Years Ago

I just read this article by Kara Gebnart Uhl from the Huffington Post. Seriously hilarious and SO true I cannot even tell you, I was the MOST judgmental person in the entire world before I had kids... shame on me, because I got it back 10-fold. Here's the article:



To the Parents I Knew Four Years Ago: I'm Sorry

I have come to realize many things since having three children. For example, I now know that I can read "We're Going on a Bear Hunt" seven times in a row without going insane. No matter what people say, throw-up is throw-up and I don't care if it is my daughter who is throwing up but her throw-up makes me want to throw up. I am a really fast diaper changer. And it's true: love does not split, but grows with additional children.

But perhaps one of the biggest realizations I've made as a relatively new parent (my daughter turns 4 in March, my twin boys turn 2 in May) is how incredibly judgmental I was pre-children.

You, the woman at Kohl's who pushed a cart with your screaming toddler draped on the rack underneath it, ignoring her as she scraped her feet on the floor because she couldn't have the toy she wanted: I judged you. Girlfriend with children who had Nick Jr. on the entire time I visited: I judged you.

Parent at the park who did not pack an organic, free-range, all-food-groups-represented, no-dessert lunch complete with sandwiches cut in cute little shapes, who instead fed your children chicken nuggets, cold French fries and (gasp) chocolate milk? I judged you.

Not out loud, of course. But internally, I was smug. I thought things like I would never have children who would behave in such a manner in public. Or, Doesn't she know the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends no TV until the age of 2? Or, How can he possibly be feeding his children that crap? Has he not read any of Michael Pollan's books?

And what's worse, now that I'm a parent, I realize internal smugness isn't so internal. As a parent, I know when I'm being judged. I can sense it, even when nothing is being said out loud. It's in the look. The double-take. The whisper to the companion they're with.

It's hard not to care about what other people think. But still, that quiet judgment can sting, especially on days when my nerves are shot and my children are in the worst moods -- a combination that often leads to a situation judge-worthy by many.

But now, as a parent, I do things judge-worthy even when my children are being good. Last Thursday is a perfect example: My son had a physical therapy appointment a good half-hour drive away. On the way back from the appointment both of my boys fell asleep -- we had eaten lunch out, complete with Oreo cookies and Popsicles for dessert, (judge!) after the appointment and it was close to their naptime. Of course they fell asleep. My daughter, however, who has long given up naps (!), was still awake.

When I pulled into my driveway, I had two choices: Wake up the boys and deal with their short tempers having only slept for 25 minutes, or sit in the van with them while they slept, bribing my daughter with apps on my iPod and promises of candy once inside if she would just sit and be quiet for a half hour longer (!). I chose option B without blinking. And I left the car running (!) the entire time.

When the boys woke up, they were furious because of the cricks in their necks -- thanks to the car seats we bought without good head support to the side simply because they were cheaper (!). My daughter was at her wit's end with being trapped in a car seat in a car that wasn't going anywhere just because I wanted some peace and quiet (!). I took everyone inside, plopped them on the couch, got out some gummy candy and turned on "Little Bear." Two episodes. (!!)


Pre-children: I was going to cloth diaper.
Post-children: I did with my daughter, sort of, but not with my twins.

Pre-children: No TV until age of 2 and then only 30 minutes a day.
Post-children: Ha. (this my be my favorite line ever! -V)

Pre-children: Only organic, healthy, homemade food.
Post-children: My kids love Wendy's.

Pre-children: Public tantrums are unacceptable.
Post-children: Removal of the child is only sometimes doable; predicting when a tantrum is going to strike is often impossible.

Pre-children: Complaints about childrearing and its hardships annoyed me (this was your choice, no?) and saddened me (parenthood is supposed to be a wonderful thing!).
Post-children: Parenthood isn't wonderful 100 percent of the time.

My day-to-day routine isn't what I envisioned it would be four years ago. Some of the things I imagine I'm judged on now are minor, others, a little more major. But mostly they are simple faults and I now know that they don't make me a bad parent. Sometimes I leave dirty diapers on the changing table. My children's socks don't always match. I forget to brush my daughter's hair. I use TV as a way to take a breather. I utilize the fast-food drive-thru. I bribe. I'm sometimes too easy. I'm sometimes too hard. I sometimes make the wrong decision, give the wrong punishment, ask too much, ask too little. But within all these minor and major faults is a singular truth: Most days, I'm doing the best I can. And I honestly believe that's a truth that can be applied to most parents: Most days, we're all doing the best we can.

 Because here's another realization I've made as a parent: Everyone's situation is different. There is a story behind every action and inaction. Every parent has his or her own style. Every child has his or her own temperament. What might be a stellar day for my family has been a downright awful day for another -- perhaps the parent's job is in danger, their parent is sick or they just had an argument with their spouse. Perhaps the child is failing math or being bullied at school, or the toddler hasn't slept for two weeks. This can explain the short-temper in the grocery store or the harsher-than-necessary punishment, or the lack of care when it comes to sweets or TV or a late bedtime. We don't know, can't know, someone's entire story.

That said, I believe there are absolutes in parenting so yes, sometimes, I still judge. (And I realize that the irony of this piece is that in writing about not judging others, I'm now judging those who judge.) I know that, for some, it's impossible to provide their children with life's basic necessities: food, clothing and shelter. But I believe we, as parents, must try. I believe we must do what we can to protect our children from harm. I believe we should always love our children, even when, especially when, we don't like their actions, we disagree with their decisions or we're just having a difficult day with them.

But everything else is minor. Everything else doesn't matter. There are children who are abused, who go to bed hungry, who have never known love, and four years ago I was judging the toddler who watched an hour of "Sesame Street"?

I feel bad about my pre-children smugness. I feel bad about the sting I may have, unknowingly, made another feel. I feel bad -- and laugh out loud at the thought -- that I, at one time, before I had children, believed I knew better. Parenting is difficult enough -- there's no reason we should judge one another, not for the things that don't matter, anyway, and not for the things we see a snippet of rather than knowing the full story.

So to the parents I knew four years ago, I'm sorry. I know better now.

Here's the link:  http://www.huffingtonpost.com/kara-gebhart-uhl/mom-judgments_b_1319775.html?icid=maing-grid10|htmlws-main-bb|dl3|sec1_lnk3&pLid=141627

-V

That Bitch!

And I mean that in the most lovingly way possible towards Ms. Jillian Michaels for making me SO sore today. Wow, it's amazing how 3 weeks of not doing something can make such a big difference. Note to self: no more skipping Jillian workouts.

So I totally caved and got J & S pizza for dinner last night. I know, I know, I totally suck. But it was such a CRAZY day and I didn't eat much of it myself (total lie).

Since it was 87 degrees here yesterday (in March... in Michigan!) my neighbor hooked up her little sprinkler toy and invited us over so the kids could play and run through it. They had a blast. Though I was a bit envious of the other women who got to just sit there and chat while their kids played. I'm the only one with a 1-year-old. So I was busy chasing S around and trying to save her from falling off of the slide, stairs, play yard, hose, etc. I love this age a lot, but it's also tiring at times. Anyway, by the time we walked back home, got everyone showered and such, it was so late. And we were all so tired, so yup... we got pizza and wine for me.

It was a fun day though. Husband comes back tomorrow and then on Saturday I have a 7:30am personal training session and then I'm off to the Detroit area to my sister's house. It's her wedding anniversary so I told them I'd watch their 2 kids for the night. She has a 2 year old and a 5 month old. I'm a bit nervous about the baby. I know I've had two myself, but I seriously can't remember what I'm supposed to do anymore. It's amazing how quickly that stuff leaves your brain once your kids grow out of it.

Still no news on when Husband leaves for his 3-week training. They are thinking it might be more like June time frame now. So who knows. I have a lot of races coming up in May, so June would probably be better. But we'll see. There really is no good time for your husband to leave for flight school for 3 weeks now, is there?

Ok, off to heat up my healthy lunch (with vegetables!) that I made for myself yesterday...

-V

MRI Results + A Few Other Things

Well hello skinny web friends!
Had my MRI results yesterday and it seems that all is GREAT with my back!  Some minor disc bulging (well, that could have been my hips too, har har har) that is getting better but overall I can get back to Zumba and my normal activities!  I'm so happy, I have to keep up with PT (which is still annoying to me, though I'm SUPER sore from the other day) and all should be fine.  Doesn't mean I don't run the risk of it happening again but I will work towards strengthening and try to keep it at bay.
One slightly alarming thing that they did mention, they were unable to locate my left kidney.  Now, the Dr. had a good chuckle about this as she kept saying that the MRI was not meant to look for kidneys but as they didn't see it...they had to mention it...twice in my documentation.  Now, this just makes me uncomfortable - was it stolen in college on a drunken stupor night?  Have I been operating on one this whole time? WTF!  WHERE IS MY KIDNEY!  The little things...
On another note - I must know, is the magic number 700?  Like, I need to tell B 700x to do the following things:

• Stop pulling his pants down and pretending to gas at me
• Put on his shoes
• Brush his teeth
• Eat his breakfast
• Stop pulling his pants down and pretending to gas at me
• Get into the tub
• Go to his room for jammies
• Stop kicking Crozzies toys around the house
• Get back in the house
• Sleep in his bed
• Stop pulling his pants down and pretending to gas at me

Annoying to say the least.  And nothings says "Hey Thursday" like a 7a melt down.  Awesomeness.  However, I refuse to let it get to me - off and running for another fantastic Thursday!
-a

Things I've Accomplished Today

• Did my first Jillian 30 Day Shred workout in 3 weeks... ugh! It was SO hard (Was happy that my butt/glute muscle didn't seem to be hurting during the workout)

• Took my kids to the park

• Went grocery shopping

• Made my healthy lunch (with vegetables!) for work tomorrow

• Ate a massive bowl of green beans (more vegetables!) for lunch the size of my head (along with some almonds and cheese)

• Got both kids to nap at the same time, giving me a much needed break

• Did the dishes AND laundry


Things I Still Need to Do:

• Shower... Jillian workout = stinky V

• Make banana muffins before my bananas start growing legs and walking away

• Put laundry away

• Go to the library AND back to the park. (I promised J we could go back after his nap... super)

• Make a healthy dinner for myself and the kids

• Don't get pizza for dinner! J keeps asking for it and we all know my love affair I have with pizza... MUST NOT CAVE!

-V

Pain in my Butt!

Ok, I seriously think I pulled my butt muscle. I'm sorry if this is TMI, but if I can't talk about it here, where else am I going to discuss my butt?

Last week when I ran intervals, the following day I could barely walk. My butt muscles hurt sooooo bad. I thought I was just sore, but I'm thinking I may have pulled something. I didn't notice it too much when I ran the race on Saturday. But last night my left butt muscle started hurting immediately after I started running intervals. And today I can barely walk, it hurts so bad.  This is SO frustrating! So I'm not sure what to do at this point. Do I take a week off running? I really don't have a lot of time to take off with my 10K just around the corner. What's interesting to me is that it didn't bother me much on Saturday, I felt it a little but not nearly like I did last night. So is this a pulled muscle or an interval thing? Thoughts on this my fellow runners?

Beyond the pain in my butt (ha ha) it was nice running with a friend last night. It went by a lot faster. She stopped after 2 miles, but I went and did another half mile on my own. I would have done the full mile but again, I was a lot of pain. I'm very happy I have found a running buddy though.

It's been a lovely stretch with husband home since last Tuesday. He leaves tomorrow for a 2 day trip, not coming back until Friday night. So I am back on my own again. I need to get some Jillian 30 Day Shred workouts in while he's gone. I haven't done a Jillian workout in a few weeks, so I need to get her in. My once, toned arms are probably back to flab now. One step forward, two back... right?

Eating has been ok for me. I've been reading a fun new blog lately (www.nosugarsweetlife.com) and she keeps a similar food log like I do, only hers are with really cool photos. Anyway, as I see what she eats daily, it's really making me realize I don't eat nearly as many veggies as I should. I'm great with lean meats and fruit, but I don't have a whole lot of vegetables in my diet. This needs to change. I'm not a huge vegetable fan, so this is difficult for me. But I am going to try really hard to have at least one of my meals with a vegetable in it.

Ok, back to work!

-V

Sleep Strike

Sorry I've been so quiet today but I've been busting my butt trying to get some graphic work done for The Hope Project people. They needed a few things out first thing this morning, so I've been a busy gal. (Don't forget to please go to The Hope Project's facebook page and 'like' them http://www.facebook.com/hopeprojectusa )

Well I ate pizza yesterday. Pretty cool, eh? No reason for it either, just ate it. And the sad thing, was it wasn't even good pizza. What a waste. And because of said pizza, my stomach is all jacked up today and I've been STARVING! Actually I've been starving ever since my race on Saturday. I mean it's not like I don't run 3 miles somewhat often anyway, so why the appetite increase?

Speaking of running, I'm going running with a neighbor friend of mine later today. We ran the same pace at the race on Saturday, so we decided that we'd be good running buddies. I'm pretty proud of myself, she wanted to quit and walk several times throughout the race and I kept her motivated to keep going. Which in turn, motivated me... I love how that all works out.


While I did pretty good in the race, I have realized that I've got a lot of training to do for this 10K coming up in May. I'm in 5K shape, but I am definitely not in 10K shape yet. I've also got the Zoo-de-Mac coming up in May. It's a 54 mile bike race from Boyne Highlands, MI to Mackinac City, MI. My husband and I have done it about 6 times now. Because I've been concentrating so much on my running lately, I haven't been on my bike a whole lot. So I really need to get some cross training in.

I'm think J is on a sleep strike. Ever since Daylight Savings, he takes FOREVER to fall asleep and is up at the crack of dawn. He's a good boy and usually just lays quietly in bed until husband or I come to get him, but more importantly I want him to sleep. He needs more sleep than this. Yet again, Daylight Savings mucking up my life

Ok, back to work...

-V